bored and bitter and looking to vent

So, as I have said before, I am at work today with no work to do.

I have done some planning, but I already have next week planned, so too much planning today will only result in me being just as bored next week.

So here's some more ranting.

The whole life in a fishbowl thing is unbelievable here. You are literally in the public eye all of the time. Imagine that you lived in a town that had one nine-foot-tall guy, who had purple hair. He couldn't get away with much, could he? You can bet he wouldn't be able to pick his nose without anyone noticing. That's kind of what it is like being the only white person in a Korean town, and the surrounding towns. Seriously, have you ever walked across an entire block with a kid staring slackjawed and pointing at you the whole way? Turning his body as you walk by? I am not exaggerating, that actually happened this morning. No word of lie.

In other news, for the first time in my life I have nothing planned. Nothing. At all, if you ignore the lessons, because I'm talking big picture here. I had university after highschool, summer after a school year, a school year after summer (sunrise, sunset), and Korea after university. But now, nothing. At all. I have no idea what I will be doing when this contract is over. I don't even have any long term plans worth writing down right now.

This seems like it should be troubling, and it is a little, but I don't think nearly as much as it should be. I'd always been thinking of teacher's college after this, but now I'm not too sure. There's so much out there, and this seems like somthing I may want to continue doing, so teacher's college right now only appears to be an addition of $100 per month when I (probably) come back here to teach, all of which will go towards paying off debt I'll get paying for it. And teaching here, for one month... I don't know if I want to be a teacher. And if anything, a cushy job like this should have made teaching seem even better. But now I'm more uncertain. I love the teaching part, but... the boredom and excessive planning time in Korea is killing me. Maybe I should buy a gameboy.

Geography? I don't know if that's going to take me anywhere. I loved the classes, and the material was very interesting, but can I see myself returning to school to secure a research or consulting job later? Not really. The classes made it sound very romantic, traipsing through the tundra/forest, various meters in hand, with hiking boots and denim shorts and a plaid cotton shirt rolled up to my elbows. Oh yeah, it would be great. For a few months, and then there would be the actual work of the work, analyzing and making spreadsheets, probably in a basement, if Mac-Corry was any indication.

Teaching geography? That I could get into. I liked talking about it, as most people who knew me would attest. But I don't want to go back to Canada, teach at Scollard Hall... it would kill me. And that sounds too "career"-ish right now. I'm not ready to commit to a curtains, let alone a life-long profession.

Teaching english? The best option so far. Once you get past the mindnumbing boredom brought on by the isolation... thank God Jessie is here. This tiny town has no english, which makes things pretty tough. At least we have eachother to keep sane. She's what brought on this whole train of thought, trying to plan her next year.

Me, I'm just glad to be able to sit back and watch the jack roll in and try to remain worry-free.

It is rapidly becoming clear that the miserable weather today is having an effect on my mood.

Is it bad that the idea of drifting for a year, maybe just working in a bar or something is really, really appealing to me right now? Maybe going to a community college and taking up pottery?

Is anyone else feeling this?